My Grandma Bailey used to often say to me that you don't have to worry about the folks that talk to themselves, only the ones who answer themselves. If that is true, then I guess folks are going to have to worry about me.
I visited my page and noticed I had not posted in two weeks, and, although there is plenty that has happened since then that I could write about, what should I write about? Immediately the problems with portfolio assessment popped into my mind. I heard myself thinking: "Grading those things took forever." Then a voice answered back: "Forever is a very long time." See? Time to worry...
Anyway, last marking period, instead of an end of the unit test and essay, I assigned a portfolio project for the poetry unit. Students were offered various modes to show what they learned in the project: lessons, reflections, original poems, explanations of the poems and, of course, the dreaded compare and contrast essay. When I added up all the points for each section, the assessment accounted for 110 total points. No pressure.
To keep the grading organized, I created a live, self-marking, assessment tool, through Excel. Even with a computer program aiding me, grading these alternative assessments took weeks to grade. That is why I am giving another portfolio project, but this one will be a group project.
The problem with group projects is avoiding one person to be saddled with the majority of the work. Why? 30 projects are easier to grade than 105. Yet, group projects offer even more challenges to the assessor. How do you balance between group and indivnual accountability? How do you prevent one student from having to do all the work?
Monitoring helps. If you're out of your seat observing, listening, and interacting with the groups, it becomes clear who has read and is pulling their own weight. The slacking student is also easy to recognize if you are closely monitoring. This is the time of the year when the good-natured ogre rears his head. Those who are not doing their daily work are oftened removed from the group and have to complete the project as an individual project. This way, the group is not penalized because they have one or more group members who won't work.
The best part? Grading these things won't take me forever.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Showing Up
Last night was a great experience in my Lancaster Challenge League at Leisure Lanes. I swept all three of my matches and two of my wins were within very narrow margins. I won my first match 206:180, my second match 215:211 and my last match 210:209. The first two matches were satisfying because when I am playing on tough scoring conditions, a win is a win. Yet I was irritated with myself because I had an opportunity, in each of the two matches, to help my team win the team totals point, but each time I threw shots errant enough to keep from striking.The last match however, reignited me. I showed up. I had been leading by 15 pins most of the match, but in the ninth frame I was a little off-balance and missed the pocket completely. I left a nasty washout: 1-2-4-6-10. I figured I just blew my match. My opponent also failed to strike in the foundation frame, but at least he only had a pesky 10pin to convert into a spare. For my part, my spare attempt was a disaster, I underestimated my ball reaction on the spare and ended up only mowing down the 1-2-4. My total after 9 frames: 180.
Then it was time for my opponent to convert his ten pin. He missed. His score in the ninth: also 180. As anchor, the scenario brewing at this point was the potential need to triple in order to win my individual along with the team point. Bowlers live for pressure situations like this one. I prefer to go first in these situations because I like to get in the head of my opponent with a solid strike.
No luck, my opponent's teammate finished before mine, so he was able to set the tone for the final frame. I have learned not to look at my opponent's shot in these situations. I had no need to know whether he struck or not. I had no need to see whether he had a lucky hit or not. My goal was clear-- triple and he can't win. So I turned my back to him and wiped dust off my bowling sole with my crying towel. The sound was unmistakably a strike, but I disciplined myself not to look at him or the score.
In pressure situations like these, I have learned to concentrate on what I could control and think in positives only. Every coach and athlete knows that though the brain may understand negatives, the body does not. My mantra in these situations (stop snickering, I do have one): Breathe. Head level. Chest high. Let the ball throw my arm. The result? A thunderous strike destroryed the rack.
He got up for his next shot. did not look at my opponents, the team, or the score. I jumped to the approach as soon as he took his first step, got a bead on my target. Breathe. Head level. (I could tell it was another strike from the sound of the impact, but it was muted by the silent chant of my mantra. God helps those who help themselves. My mantra, my prayer, steady my body Lord, I can do the rest.) Chest high. Let the ball throw my arm. Bam! Another solid strike.
He lead the charge into the third bonus ball. Again, not looking, I recognized the sound, tinny and unimpressive, probably a flat ten pin. I didn't know. I noted his teammates' condoling encouragement, but I would not look at his score or his lane. I didn't want to know. "Just execute." I could feel my balance slip a little into the delivery so I rotated it harder at the release. Bang. Strike three.
Mission accomplished. I won the match. I showed up. The adrenaline rush was awesome. Slowly, my game was coming back. After nearly 2 years of fighting through rehab of a replaced ACL and resurfaced minisci in my sliding leg, the player I know I was, and still am, is returning. Vindication. Affirmation. It turns out that, not only did I win all three individual points, but I also posted the third high series for the night in our league.
Finally, I was able to do in league what I try to do each day in class: show up. It's not about attendance, its about being present, living in the moment, and showing you can be counted upon. That is when the richness of our profession fills me up. There is nothing like the feeling of "I did that," and the that was helping a kid be successful, not just helping the team win a match. Priceless. I imagine my satisfaction in living a purposeful life is much the same as my father's when his five patents for television designed were approved and GE implemented them immediately into production. This is my vocation. Selfishly, I stay in it because I love knowing that what I do in my classroom matters, not just for today but also into the future. Every decision I consciously and unconsciously make is preidcated upon that one conviction.
This week I was presented with a reading problem from a concerned parent. We just started literature circles and her child was having extreme difficulty reading one chapter. After reading the parent e-mail, I took the time to call the student over and ask him about how his reading was going. After talking a while, it was clear to me that he needed to hear the words.
The problem brought me back to my old days as a reading teacher in NJ. That school had an extensive audio library, nearly every book taught in our classes was available as an audio book. The student softened when he finally realized I was trying to help him. Today, he came to class feeling accomplished because using the read-aloud strategy enabled him to do his homework without a hitch. It's taken three marking periods for the student to get that I'm a teacher, and not an ogre or disciplinarian. For me, there is no comparison to seeing a closed, frustrated face open to you, ready to learn. I fight internally daily to be present for my students, to be ready when they are ready to let down their defenses and let me teach them. I fight being influenced by frustrations generated by the other stuff.
My dad told me when I was a teen, "Boy, if you never want to work a day in your life, do something you love. You won't believe they're paying you to do it." It took me three different career paths to find that job and this is it. He also admonished me "There is [stuff] you will have to deal with in every job, but that [stuff] won't matter so much when you're doing what you're supposed to be doing." There is stuff, plenty of it, I try not to get overwhelmed by it. I remember church ladies on Sunday mornings in my grandmother's church testifying how they would not let evil steal their joy. I don't let stuff steal mine. I am present. When I stop being able to be present, I will stop teaching.
...bet you didn't think I'd be able to take a successful bowling night and bring it back to teaching, did you?
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Black History Month
"Soul and race are private dominions." - Michael S. Harper, "A Love Supreme"
I few yawns ago in history, the world was flat. A couple blinks ago, teaching the accomplishments and contributions of non-whites and women to American history, culture, and science was a novel idea. The world is not flat-- everyone knows it-- we have satelites orbiting our lop-sided Big Blue Marble proving that. Non-black children gleefully make their elders uncomfortable "spitting" n-word laden lyrics with their earbuds planted in their ears, trying to match the meter, rhythm, and passion of the mc on their ipods and mp3 players. Affirmative action is under serious scrutiny by the US Supreme Court this year, and I even have adults asking my why there isn't a national white history month, or why can't we take elective courses in white history.
Memo to my educational peers: we have lost our way. I integrated suburban schools in the 1970s, colleges in the 1980s and am still integrating as an established teacher. I didn't like being singled out, however benevolently and affectionately, by revered and trusted teachers when they pointed out all the things I was first at, by virtue of the color of my skin. I resented being pressured into joining the Black Student Union in college (there were less than 20 blacks on a campus with just shy of 1800 students). I was extremely uncomfortable with being drafted to head up the African American Club in my first teaching gig. -- not only was I pressured into accepting a leadership role with the club, but I also had to submit to monthly 7am meetings with the district African American Parents Network to report my actions, future and past, with the group: welcome to first year teaching, fun.
All of these experiences have led me to a practice that I don't think is that radical. I don't explicitly teach an African American History month unit or even a lesson. Rather, I consciously select every variety of vegetable availabe to thow in my salad bowl of curricular reading materials: white, black, Latino, indigenous peoples, Asian, males, females, etc.. Discussions of race only come up when the subject matter leads us there. For example, when we read an excerpt from Maya Angelou's I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, the events were about segregation, prejudice, respect, and pride. We connected back to SE Hinton's That Was Then, This Is Now and the civil rights video we viewed to supplement the civil rights era race conflict in the story.
I was a student when the only black writer we heard about was Dr. King. I also remember that the library had books about others-- I retreated to the library often and read everything the school had about people who looked like me-- their accomplishments, their writings, their stories, their dreams. I also read everything the library had about vampires, bowling, ghosts, vulcanoes, and monster movies. I try to remember not to be myopic when I teach, because students have multiple interests and passions. I also try to remember it's not the 1970s and that my current 8th graders were born between 1997 and 1999. They not only don't understand the 20th century, they don't remember it.
However, I am not ready to say it is time to retire "the months" -- Black History Month, Women's History Month. Why? Not everyone is committed to, or adept at, making their curricular materials inclusive of the human condition. On the other hand, when people are genuinely asking me why there is no White History Month, it becomes clear that in the zeal towards inclusivity, we have alienated others to the point that they don't notice the reason for the inclusion in the first place. How many national holidays have been enacted to honor the accomplishments and contributions of an American woman, a Native American, Latino? Do you know who Lewis Lattimer was, or why he comes to mind as I sit in an artificially lit room blogging to you?
History has its name for a reason: "his" + "story." Some history educators point out that history is written by those who won, won the war, won the credit... Besides Madame Curie, see if you can rattle off 7 women who profoundly impacted the world we live in today. Besides George Washington Carver, Malcom X, and Martin Luther King, can you list 5 African Americans that you learned about in school? Besides Chief Joseph and Chief Crazy Horse, can you list 5 Native Americans that you learned about in school before college? Who was Cesar Chavez and what impact did he have upon US Labor policy? What did the Coolie Act have to do with fair labor practices in the West and why were the Irish immigrants of the 19th century threatened by Chinese immigrants? Until our students know the story of our nation and can rattle off answers with the same speed that they can tell about the Mayflower, Continental Congress, and The Revolutionary War, we are probably still going to need to teach a segregated history that is out of context and anachronistic.
Along the way, let's not turn students off.
I few yawns ago in history, the world was flat. A couple blinks ago, teaching the accomplishments and contributions of non-whites and women to American history, culture, and science was a novel idea. The world is not flat-- everyone knows it-- we have satelites orbiting our lop-sided Big Blue Marble proving that. Non-black children gleefully make their elders uncomfortable "spitting" n-word laden lyrics with their earbuds planted in their ears, trying to match the meter, rhythm, and passion of the mc on their ipods and mp3 players. Affirmative action is under serious scrutiny by the US Supreme Court this year, and I even have adults asking my why there isn't a national white history month, or why can't we take elective courses in white history.
Memo to my educational peers: we have lost our way. I integrated suburban schools in the 1970s, colleges in the 1980s and am still integrating as an established teacher. I didn't like being singled out, however benevolently and affectionately, by revered and trusted teachers when they pointed out all the things I was first at, by virtue of the color of my skin. I resented being pressured into joining the Black Student Union in college (there were less than 20 blacks on a campus with just shy of 1800 students). I was extremely uncomfortable with being drafted to head up the African American Club in my first teaching gig. -- not only was I pressured into accepting a leadership role with the club, but I also had to submit to monthly 7am meetings with the district African American Parents Network to report my actions, future and past, with the group: welcome to first year teaching, fun.
All of these experiences have led me to a practice that I don't think is that radical. I don't explicitly teach an African American History month unit or even a lesson. Rather, I consciously select every variety of vegetable availabe to thow in my salad bowl of curricular reading materials: white, black, Latino, indigenous peoples, Asian, males, females, etc.. Discussions of race only come up when the subject matter leads us there. For example, when we read an excerpt from Maya Angelou's I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, the events were about segregation, prejudice, respect, and pride. We connected back to SE Hinton's That Was Then, This Is Now and the civil rights video we viewed to supplement the civil rights era race conflict in the story.
I was a student when the only black writer we heard about was Dr. King. I also remember that the library had books about others-- I retreated to the library often and read everything the school had about people who looked like me-- their accomplishments, their writings, their stories, their dreams. I also read everything the library had about vampires, bowling, ghosts, vulcanoes, and monster movies. I try to remember not to be myopic when I teach, because students have multiple interests and passions. I also try to remember it's not the 1970s and that my current 8th graders were born between 1997 and 1999. They not only don't understand the 20th century, they don't remember it.
However, I am not ready to say it is time to retire "the months" -- Black History Month, Women's History Month. Why? Not everyone is committed to, or adept at, making their curricular materials inclusive of the human condition. On the other hand, when people are genuinely asking me why there is no White History Month, it becomes clear that in the zeal towards inclusivity, we have alienated others to the point that they don't notice the reason for the inclusion in the first place. How many national holidays have been enacted to honor the accomplishments and contributions of an American woman, a Native American, Latino? Do you know who Lewis Lattimer was, or why he comes to mind as I sit in an artificially lit room blogging to you?
History has its name for a reason: "his" + "story." Some history educators point out that history is written by those who won, won the war, won the credit... Besides Madame Curie, see if you can rattle off 7 women who profoundly impacted the world we live in today. Besides George Washington Carver, Malcom X, and Martin Luther King, can you list 5 African Americans that you learned about in school? Besides Chief Joseph and Chief Crazy Horse, can you list 5 Native Americans that you learned about in school before college? Who was Cesar Chavez and what impact did he have upon US Labor policy? What did the Coolie Act have to do with fair labor practices in the West and why were the Irish immigrants of the 19th century threatened by Chinese immigrants? Until our students know the story of our nation and can rattle off answers with the same speed that they can tell about the Mayflower, Continental Congress, and The Revolutionary War, we are probably still going to need to teach a segregated history that is out of context and anachronistic.
Along the way, let's not turn students off.
Thursday, February 7, 2013
New Tricks, Old Canine
I am not sure that anyone has administratively asked for clear self-improvement goals from me since I left New Jersey. That's probably a problem, since I have been teaching in PA for the last 8 years. I had become rusty at thinking about my profession in such terms. That lead to me feeling a little "stuck." I went to the meeting with something, which is always better than nothing, but it had no "punch."
To his credit, Mr. Terch recognized that and pushed me. He asked me "What have you learned that is new to you in the past 12 months?" I guess that was a fair question, but it was a little unsettling. I did not want to say "nothing" because that would not have been true. I learned about formative assessment and learned that my natural desire to include novelty into my pedagogy was not just having fun with my students, but that it was also helpful to their learning.
But when he pressed me on technology, I had nothing. Technology requires a budgeting priority in my life that does not exist. With a remodel underway in my large bathroom, new car payments, and a 3 year salary freeze, buying gizmos that I don't need or have any real interest in, was definitely not on my radar. Bandwagon propaganda has never appealed to me.
I grew up in an engineering family: dad is a retired electrical engineer, my sister is an electrical engineer, and while I was growing up, both of my brothers-in-law were electrical engineers. I gained the understanding that new technology is expensive and often has bugs in it, and that if you wait long enough for the electronic competitors to come out with similar products, the price will come down. For that reason, I did not acquire my first cell phone until 2004, I bought my first CD player in 1991, my first DVD player in 2006, and I received my first iPod this year for my46th birthday.
The funny thing about technology. It's like options on a new car. If you don't buy it on your car, you don't know what you're missing, but once you experience the benefits, you don't know how you lived without it. When I was in college, I spent one summer with my 86 year old maternal grandmother, while clerking with a law firm in Columbus, OH. In return for allowing me to stay with her rent-free, I purchased groceries and was her personal chauffer anywhere she wanted to go. As a "thank-you" gift, I purchased a microwave oven for her. She called it the "miracle wave" because she did not know how she managed to raise 7 children without one.
At the end of the year, I will be able to tell my principal that not only did I learn to create, broadcast, and share multi-media prezis, I also learned to download apps, rip music and video onto my iPod Touch, sync my automobile to my iPod, and use it as a coaching tool. Who says old dogs cannot learn new tricks?
Woof!
PS- Teaching propaganda? Check out this prezi! (Yup, I'm proud of myself.)
http://prezi.com/npw0y9_a-gce/propaganda-notes/?kw=view-npw0y9_a-gce&rc=ref-20374267
To his credit, Mr. Terch recognized that and pushed me. He asked me "What have you learned that is new to you in the past 12 months?" I guess that was a fair question, but it was a little unsettling. I did not want to say "nothing" because that would not have been true. I learned about formative assessment and learned that my natural desire to include novelty into my pedagogy was not just having fun with my students, but that it was also helpful to their learning.
But when he pressed me on technology, I had nothing. Technology requires a budgeting priority in my life that does not exist. With a remodel underway in my large bathroom, new car payments, and a 3 year salary freeze, buying gizmos that I don't need or have any real interest in, was definitely not on my radar. Bandwagon propaganda has never appealed to me.
I grew up in an engineering family: dad is a retired electrical engineer, my sister is an electrical engineer, and while I was growing up, both of my brothers-in-law were electrical engineers. I gained the understanding that new technology is expensive and often has bugs in it, and that if you wait long enough for the electronic competitors to come out with similar products, the price will come down. For that reason, I did not acquire my first cell phone until 2004, I bought my first CD player in 1991, my first DVD player in 2006, and I received my first iPod this year for my46th birthday.
The funny thing about technology. It's like options on a new car. If you don't buy it on your car, you don't know what you're missing, but once you experience the benefits, you don't know how you lived without it. When I was in college, I spent one summer with my 86 year old maternal grandmother, while clerking with a law firm in Columbus, OH. In return for allowing me to stay with her rent-free, I purchased groceries and was her personal chauffer anywhere she wanted to go. As a "thank-you" gift, I purchased a microwave oven for her. She called it the "miracle wave" because she did not know how she managed to raise 7 children without one.
At the end of the year, I will be able to tell my principal that not only did I learn to create, broadcast, and share multi-media prezis, I also learned to download apps, rip music and video onto my iPod Touch, sync my automobile to my iPod, and use it as a coaching tool. Who says old dogs cannot learn new tricks?
Woof!
PS- Teaching propaganda? Check out this prezi! (Yup, I'm proud of myself.)
http://prezi.com/npw0y9_a-gce/propaganda-notes/?kw=view-npw0y9_a-gce&rc=ref-20374267
Friday, January 18, 2013
Mixed Bag of Thoughts and Reactions
It's been over a week since my last post. If anyone is out there reading and wondering where I've been:
For people who read this to get insight into the mind of educators, I have been silent about the recent school shootings purposefully. I don't have proposals or insights to share. The terror inflicted upon the children and educators, in both incidents, cannot be cooked down into a satisfactory analysis that brings about a swift resolution.
At the risk of sounding like a cop-out: it's complicated. Are there problems in this country with regards to who has acceess to firearms? Yes. Are there deficiencies in the way our nation deals with the mental health needs of its citizenry? Yes. Should we rush to make new ordinances in a knee-jerk reaction to the violence that keeps happening? I am not sure. That is all I have to say about that.
Personally, a part of me always knew I was involved in a dangerous profession from the time I was a student teacher. As a student-teacher, I had a student in my class who was involved in a lethal car-jacking in Philadelphia, who was under house arrest, and who wore his "ankle bracelet" proudly. In another incident, a student was shot by an intruder in the stomach during lunch in the cafeteria. Adding to my "Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore" reality, there were also numerous cases of attempted arson to the building, and another intruder pistol-whipped a student just outside the principal's office. These facts made it an inescapable reality that teaching there was dangerous.
Then, in 1996, it happened in the spring. Columbine. The tragedy there drove a point home to me that teaching is dangerous anywhere. I was teaching in the West Windsor-Plainsboro School District near Princeton, NJ. Our demographics were similar to Columbine's and so were our social issues. We also had a population of parents who worked high-salaried, high-powered jobs that sometimes would leave them clueless about their children's actions. It was completely believable to me that a kid's parents could be oblivious while he stock-piled enough weaponry in the garage to outfit a couple platoons. That's when I realized "it could happen here too."
My response was not of fear for myself, but for my students. I understood the adolescent desire to destroy bullies, tormentors, mean girls-- the monsters of adolescence, who make most grown-ups emphatically reject the notion of regression to adolescence. Middle school and/or high school were rough on everyone. No one wants to do it again. Those who actually act out their morbid fantasies of retribution are symptomatic of breakdowns in our nation about values, mental health and access to weaponry. I've got nothing. I don't really want to play the blame game--- it doesn't serve anything and it doesn't help solve the problem. Again. It's complicated.
Finally, I missed three days of class becase I had jury duty. Here's the shorthand. About three hundred citizens of York County were called to serve jury duty this week. We waited in lines for hours just to be processed into a room where we sat and we were talked at for another hour and a half. Then we were coralled into courtrooms 40 at a time to be selected into 12 person juries. The rejected prospective jurors were sent back to the holding room.
I was selected from myfirst "cattle call." We heard a criminal case and found the defendant not guilty on all counts. We weren't saying he was innocent, but when someone comes at you swinging a pick-ax with intent to do you harm and all you do is whack him with a metal basebal bat-- that's self-defense, and we all agreed. The "victim" only had a bat-shaped welt on his back no cracked ribs or anything. In our view he was fortunate because, if the defendant was perpetrating an assault with that bat, we would be looking at that plus attempted murder charges too.
The experience was eye-opening. Maybe Jerry Springer and Maury Povitch aren't staged after all--- we met the real McCoys and the Hatfields on trial this week.
I posted on Facebook about being happy to go back to work once we were released from jury duty. A friend responded that she liked and then unliked my post because: "wanting to go back to work is just wrong." SALTS (smiled a little then stopped.) I like my job; there was even a time in my career when my job was everything in my life. When I have to go somewhere that takes me away from my class, I long to be back in class, interacting with my students. Some say that's weird. I say I'm blessed, because I found my calling.
Even my students miss me when I'm gone. Most of them. That tells me something good.
We're now in BYOD every day mode. Third marking period. There is grumbling in the building because kids are being kids and they push the boundaries. They do that with everything. It is more interesting to me what the kids are doing right than what they are doing wrong. I know-- that makes me wierd but then again John C. Maxwell points out that: "Your attitude is the outward expression of an inward feeling." What does it say about others who think that I'm too polyana?
What are they doing that's interesting to me. Some kids are using a notetaking app on their ipods, smart phones and ipads called "In class." This app lets kids take notes, in order, according to their class schedule, they can organize photos they take of notes from the chalk board and the app will save it under "Logan English Period 4" for example. Awesome. It works too-- they aren't as clueless about what's going on. Does this mean I am getting through to digital natives on their home turf? Too soon to tell...
Kids are plugging into their tunes on their ipods and pumping out drafts in record time. Some may peer into my room with disapproval of the freedom I've given my students, but my bottom line is being fulfilled. The work is getting finished and produced at higher levels of quality. Students are exhibiting signs of increased motivation. What's wrong with that?
- It was the end of the second marking period and closing out the quarter took priority
- I had quite a bit to respond to but I wasn't sure how to frame my respond
- Jury duty--- couldn't write what was on my mind because of sequester orders from the judge.
For people who read this to get insight into the mind of educators, I have been silent about the recent school shootings purposefully. I don't have proposals or insights to share. The terror inflicted upon the children and educators, in both incidents, cannot be cooked down into a satisfactory analysis that brings about a swift resolution.
At the risk of sounding like a cop-out: it's complicated. Are there problems in this country with regards to who has acceess to firearms? Yes. Are there deficiencies in the way our nation deals with the mental health needs of its citizenry? Yes. Should we rush to make new ordinances in a knee-jerk reaction to the violence that keeps happening? I am not sure. That is all I have to say about that.
Personally, a part of me always knew I was involved in a dangerous profession from the time I was a student teacher. As a student-teacher, I had a student in my class who was involved in a lethal car-jacking in Philadelphia, who was under house arrest, and who wore his "ankle bracelet" proudly. In another incident, a student was shot by an intruder in the stomach during lunch in the cafeteria. Adding to my "Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore" reality, there were also numerous cases of attempted arson to the building, and another intruder pistol-whipped a student just outside the principal's office. These facts made it an inescapable reality that teaching there was dangerous.
Then, in 1996, it happened in the spring. Columbine. The tragedy there drove a point home to me that teaching is dangerous anywhere. I was teaching in the West Windsor-Plainsboro School District near Princeton, NJ. Our demographics were similar to Columbine's and so were our social issues. We also had a population of parents who worked high-salaried, high-powered jobs that sometimes would leave them clueless about their children's actions. It was completely believable to me that a kid's parents could be oblivious while he stock-piled enough weaponry in the garage to outfit a couple platoons. That's when I realized "it could happen here too."
My response was not of fear for myself, but for my students. I understood the adolescent desire to destroy bullies, tormentors, mean girls-- the monsters of adolescence, who make most grown-ups emphatically reject the notion of regression to adolescence. Middle school and/or high school were rough on everyone. No one wants to do it again. Those who actually act out their morbid fantasies of retribution are symptomatic of breakdowns in our nation about values, mental health and access to weaponry. I've got nothing. I don't really want to play the blame game--- it doesn't serve anything and it doesn't help solve the problem. Again. It's complicated.
Finally, I missed three days of class becase I had jury duty. Here's the shorthand. About three hundred citizens of York County were called to serve jury duty this week. We waited in lines for hours just to be processed into a room where we sat and we were talked at for another hour and a half. Then we were coralled into courtrooms 40 at a time to be selected into 12 person juries. The rejected prospective jurors were sent back to the holding room.
I was selected from myfirst "cattle call." We heard a criminal case and found the defendant not guilty on all counts. We weren't saying he was innocent, but when someone comes at you swinging a pick-ax with intent to do you harm and all you do is whack him with a metal basebal bat-- that's self-defense, and we all agreed. The "victim" only had a bat-shaped welt on his back no cracked ribs or anything. In our view he was fortunate because, if the defendant was perpetrating an assault with that bat, we would be looking at that plus attempted murder charges too.
The experience was eye-opening. Maybe Jerry Springer and Maury Povitch aren't staged after all--- we met the real McCoys and the Hatfields on trial this week.
I posted on Facebook about being happy to go back to work once we were released from jury duty. A friend responded that she liked and then unliked my post because: "wanting to go back to work is just wrong." SALTS (smiled a little then stopped.) I like my job; there was even a time in my career when my job was everything in my life. When I have to go somewhere that takes me away from my class, I long to be back in class, interacting with my students. Some say that's weird. I say I'm blessed, because I found my calling.
Even my students miss me when I'm gone. Most of them. That tells me something good.
We're now in BYOD every day mode. Third marking period. There is grumbling in the building because kids are being kids and they push the boundaries. They do that with everything. It is more interesting to me what the kids are doing right than what they are doing wrong. I know-- that makes me wierd but then again John C. Maxwell points out that: "Your attitude is the outward expression of an inward feeling." What does it say about others who think that I'm too polyana?
What are they doing that's interesting to me. Some kids are using a notetaking app on their ipods, smart phones and ipads called "In class." This app lets kids take notes, in order, according to their class schedule, they can organize photos they take of notes from the chalk board and the app will save it under "Logan English Period 4" for example. Awesome. It works too-- they aren't as clueless about what's going on. Does this mean I am getting through to digital natives on their home turf? Too soon to tell...
Kids are plugging into their tunes on their ipods and pumping out drafts in record time. Some may peer into my room with disapproval of the freedom I've given my students, but my bottom line is being fulfilled. The work is getting finished and produced at higher levels of quality. Students are exhibiting signs of increased motivation. What's wrong with that?
Thursday, January 3, 2013
New Year
2012 was--- I dunno. Too many adjectives, some sad, some tragic, some triumphant, some flabberghasting, some inspirational-- it was a year, in all it's glory and wonder.
In this new year and even during the last month of the old one, I wasn't thinking about resolutions--- I'm already fulfilling one-- mostly. I am thinking about where the last year has taken me in my growth as a teacher, a citizen, and a human being. I've tried new things, rediscovered my voice as a writer, activist, and teacher. In the coming months I want to keep learning.
I'm still peeling back the layers of the Mr. Logan I am evolving into. So I don't have a new resolution; it is just a continuation of 2012's: to evolve and become a better educator to 21st century learners. Stay tuned-- I'm just getting started.
In this new year and even during the last month of the old one, I wasn't thinking about resolutions--- I'm already fulfilling one-- mostly. I am thinking about where the last year has taken me in my growth as a teacher, a citizen, and a human being. I've tried new things, rediscovered my voice as a writer, activist, and teacher. In the coming months I want to keep learning.
I'm still peeling back the layers of the Mr. Logan I am evolving into. So I don't have a new resolution; it is just a continuation of 2012's: to evolve and become a better educator to 21st century learners. Stay tuned-- I'm just getting started.
Enough
When crazy, horrific events happen, the media stokes the flames of quick, panacea-seeking answers from the right and from the left. Politicians use these tragedies to rally their base for their pet crusades-- gun control, mental healthcare. Have we lost our ability to come together as a nation?
Have we lost our desire to solve the problems we face as a nation? We are not the generation that used its collective will, resources, intellectual trusts, and American ingenuity to win the space race. And yet, I believe that potential is within us nonetheless. I have to. I'm a teacher who teaches the next generation with hope for tomorrow.
But, to be honest, I am disappointed in us as a nation. We would rather fight on extremes of every position rather than admit that each of the many issues we face: fossil fuel dependency, funding public education, climate change, terrorism, health care, social justice, immigration, even the fiscal cliff, are complex problems with no simple answers, but with a collective will to solve them (rather than self-serving attacks to win a debates) we can. I refuse to believe that the progeny of the generation that put the first man on the moon is incapable of summoning its collective will to solve the problems of our nation.
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